Divorce is never easy and when you add to the stress the trauma of disagreeing on what is best for any minors involved, the process can take its toll on all involved. That’s where mediation can come in—if there is a chance you and the opposing party can reach an agreement, consider letting a third party mediator assist you.
If it is feasible, mediation is a great choice when trying to reach the most beneficial outcome for all involved. If you have decided on family mediation in Louisiana, follow these few great tips for setting ground rules.
- Keep the blame out of it.
Both parties are present at a mediation because the situation has broken down. It will save yourself and the other party a lot of headache and raw emotion if you agree to not hash out whom each feels is to blame before or during the mediation. You are there to reach an outcome that is beneficial to all parties involved and not to decide who wronged who. Leave blame and anger at the door. - Use names, not pronouns.
If it is a contentious case, it is tempting to refer to the other party as a pronoun like “he” or “she” or “that person.” But in mediation, everyone has a name and everyone’s opinion and views are valuable. By using someone’s name, it helps personalize the discussion for both parties and lets the other person know you are considering them when you speak. Agree to treat each other maturely and as a human being at the outset and expect better results. - Let the other party have their say.
There will be times in family mediation that the other party says something that gets under your skin, hurts your feelings, or makes you angry. However, it is important to let the other party speak and not interrupt them while they are talking – no matter how much you disagree. You will have your chance to speak about the issue after the other person finishes talking. Interruptions cause unnecessary arguments and delays and make the mediation process more difficult. Wait your turn to speak so that you can talk without interruption and focus on everything the other person said.
